Monday, February 2, 2015

Captain Save-a-Ho to the Rescue!


Have no fear, Captain Save-a-Ho is here! Nope. Not a chance. So what’s a “Save-a-Ho?”, you may be asking? You may not be asking, but I’ll tell you anyway. Well, it’s even worse than a White Knight. “And what’s a White Knight?”, you also might ask? Did you ask? No? I’ll tell you anyway. A White Knight is a dude who takes it upon himself to “protect a woman’s honor.” Now that in itself is hilarious and I have literally LOL’d when I’ve heard guys say this. What honor? They threw any honor, civility, and dignity out the window several years ago and are getting worse by the week. Regardless, these guys think that if they pretend that women are sweet, innocent victims of the big, bad male gender, then maybe—just maybe maybe maybe—said women will one day suddenly announce, “Gasp! You really care for me! I want a man who will protect my sacred honor! Let’s fuck for days on end!” The number of North American women who have actually said this to White Knights: ZERO.


But these men…er…boys…keep acting like feminist, pussy-whipped eunuchs, replying to critiques on women with “How dare you say anything bad about these poor, sweet ladies!” They join vile third-wave feminist websites (like Jezebel and SluttyGirlProblems) and Facebook groups, they Tweet out the latest anti-male garbage that comes down the pike, and they kiss the asses of all the women they know, groveling and flattering and catering to the every whims of the female gender, all for naught.

Captain Save-a-Ho guys are even worse. They are White Knights in word and deed, but they go one step further, one major step further. They provide financial assistance to women who have “hit the Wall” in their life, often shacking up or marrying these gals. These women have squandered their entire teen (often even pre-teen) and young adult years partying and sleeping around with the “bad boys,” have had kids with them (often numerous kids from numerous scumbags), and are working on their first, second, or even third divorces. Yet the alimony still isn’t enough, and these Post-Wall skanks are now broke, used-up, stretched-out, their kids are a mess, and they’re back yet again living with their worthless parents. It’s always ironic how all women poke fun mercilessly at men in their 20s or 30s who may live with a parent or other family member, yet all these females go back to their parent’s house with their kids over and over again while they’re between marriages or relationships. Hypocrites, much?

Captain Save-a-Ho has often been “orbiting” one woman or even more than one, waiting and waiting and waiting for them to come out of yet another failed relationship with the tall bad boys. The Orbiter spends a lot of time being the personal White Knight of these females, hoping that he can be next in the long line of successors to their vaginas. Finally, the time comes, and our fearless superhero springs into action, providing a sounding board for the emotional, crying, “I’m soooo lonely because I’ve gone a whole two days without a boyfriend/husband!” woman and, PRESTO! After assuring her that she and her kids will be provided for hand and foot, Captain Sav-a-Ho actually gets the girl…like dozens upon dozens of other men before him. So he gives her money, clothes, jewelry, handbags, a place to live for both she and her bratty, out of control kids…all for some barely half-way decent sex every now and then, if even that.

Say, who’s that with the used-up bitch? It’s a chump! It’s a sucker! It’s Captain Sav-a-Ho!

Why any self-respecting man would be a pussy beggar and begin relationships with these women is far beyond my level of comprehension. I can’t understand how any guy would want to marry needy women with kids; it goes against every fiber and sinew of manliness to want to get himself into such a dire situation. Why spend loads of your money on a whore who just wants you to take care of her and her children? Remember that the overwhelming majority of kids raised by young single women turn out bad, really bad. Those kids will be your responsibility when the boys commit crimes and do drugs, and when the girls get knocked up in high school to some scumbag, proudly following in her mom’s footsteps. You’ll be spending even more money to bail them out, either from jail or from their immoral sexual choices. Your wife sure won’t be! She’ll be secretly banging the lowlife dudes just like she specifically raised her daughter to do, and you’ll be left dealing with the incredible, nightmarish mess created by her and her demon offspring. And in a while, the needy, helpless woman that you scooped up into your arms and carried over the threshold will become “unhaaaaapy” and want a divorce as her pre-Menopause hormones go into overdrive. Although her hellion kids will thankfully be gone, so will she, and a great deal of your money with alimony.

Happens. Every. Single. Time.

Is it worth it, men? Is the utter misery, pain and financial burdens worth it? All of this just to say that you have an American wife? All of this just to get very mediocre sex from a stretched-out, used-up twat every now and then? Men, please, please think twice before you decide to orbit some bitch and play the good guy who will give her all her wants and needs (and her kid’s). It’s not worth it, not by a long shot. Don’t be a Captain Sav-a-Ho!