Now, sometimes, the woman is actually good-looking and has no kids (I know, a rarity), but the guy still makes an utter fool of himself in either trying to woo her over or keep her if he actually has her in a relationship. He does this only because she is hot. Hot women never have any personality or other redeeming qualities of any kind; they simply are hot.
Regardless of whether the females are hot or not, the guys who are simps still act like complete fools. They grovel and pine and beg for the attention and approval of these women, yet rarely or never get anything in return. They pay for women’s drinks at a bar, they buy flowers or other gifts for them, they leave comments on women’s various social media sites (mainly Instagram now), saying things like “you’re so hot” or “hottest woman I’ve ever seen” or “so sexy” or even…wait for it…“please, please date me!” Of course, there is almost never, ever a response from the woman, and if there is, it’s “awwweee, thanks,” aka “return to the Friendzone that you tried to slither away from.”
These simps think that woman are all damsels in distress, sweet, innocent princesses who are just waiting to be rescued. These guys are always White Knights and sometimes go so far as to be Captain Sav-a-Ho’s. They think that by acting this way, they will get the girl. Rarely does it work, but here is once such instance of a simp and Captain Sav-a-Ho just by a cursory Facebook search:
Two very young half-black kids from two different black fathers…and this white simp pretends to like them just so he can hook up with a trashy slut and get very infrequent sex. Lowering himself to the gutter, putting pussy over pride, vagina over values, sex over self-respect. No guy who isn’t a pussy-begging simp would even consider letting some trash with two freshly-squirted-out kids into his life, let alone shacking up with one and helping pay all her bills! I love how he is trying to look like he’s actually interested in raising these illegitimate half-breed kids that aren’t his own, but he’s obviously faking it.
But here comes the rub: this is just one of loads and loads of such guys (not men, just guys) who are simping. These photos are the very tip of the iceberg here in the White Trash Mecca and other places. Look on Facebook or—back in the day—Myspace, and you see tons of guys like this. You see this repeated en masse, some even in worse situations. I mean, we’re talking four kids from four different baby daddies, the woman is unemployed, fat, smelly and has a criminal history. Yet men—black, white and Latino—simp it up with these women, and these females never go more than a few days—sometimes just hours—without countless thirsty simps after them. No matter how gross or slovenly or useless the female is, they have an entourage of thirsty males pleading for them. No female ever has to worry about being alone or not having a pussy-whipped mangina take care of them, because there are so many such pussies out there now.
Here’s a perfect example. I know this hot young piece of ass I’ll just call “Hot Ass” because her booty is incredible and probably tastes like nutmeg and cloves) who is half-black/half-white; her parents, like all interracial relationships here in the White Trash Mecca, was black daddy/white momma (black women refuse to date white guys). The mother ended up killing the father, which is usually the other way around in said interracial relationships. Hot Ass has two kids from two different drug-dealing black guys and both guys are in prison for felonies! The black guy she is with now is almost twice her age and Hot Ass basically admits that she is just using him for money to help pay for her two out-of-wedlock kids from different baby daddies. So a dude will actually simp it up, be a Sav-a-Ho, and let a woman with loads of baggage and tons of poor life choices shack up with him and spend his money and drive his ghetto-looking car, just to say he’s getting sex from a piece of ass? You can’t make this stuff up, guys. The simp is real. Simp. Just. Happened. And it happens every friggen day.
Still aren’t convinced that simping is absolutely cringe-worthy? Still not??? I’ll tell you about a co-worker of mine who I will call “Dumb Ass.” He’s several years younger than me and just as short, yet was actually able to get a long-time girlfriend, which is rare that any guy under 6’2” even gets dates nowadays. However, like all women, she started to go after the taller bad boys and dumped Dumb Ass’s ass, but not before banging a bunch of redneck scumbags in Pasco County (major redneck hotbed on the Gulf Coast). Dumb Ass thought that maybe he got her knocked up in a drunken sex session just before the slut dumped him and while she was fucking the tall bad boys, but he couldn’t be for sure. The bimbo had a miscarriage, which is very rare that sluts have miscarriages around here as they always squirt out their terrible babies. Well, Dumb Ass decided that he needed to call off work (when he was in dire need of being there) so he could zip off all the way to Pasco County and “console” his cheating, lying, whore ex-girlfriend all night, just because it might—MIGHT—have been his baby. Might! This is one of those trailer trash instances where Maury would have to be called in to do a paternity test just to see who the dad was. Yet Dumb Ass called in sick for work to go be by the side of a typical local whore and get nothing in return. Now that is major simpage!! I honestly don’t think there is any intervention that can take place with Dumb Ass or guys like him. And there seem to be many, many guys like him nowadays.
This comes to the part that you knew was coming if you read >Captain Sav-a-Ho to the Rescue.